Getting used to the gazes

When people ask me about my long hair, I tell them that I have never cut it because of my religion.

That is true about the hair on my head, but not about the hair elsewhere on my body. That is - I have shaved, waxed, and threaded. Does this make me a bad person?

I am not sure. Clearly, 98% of the rest of "my world" - particularly the females - remove their body hair. And most of these people are not, necessarily, "bad".

Do I feel guilty about it? To be honest - not really. It was something I went through to fit in. But my actions were still in line with Sikhi: nam japna, vand chakna, kirt karni.

About 2 years ago, after much meditation, I slowly stopped these hair-removing processes. It wasn't something that I woke up and immediately decided. It just kind of happened. And with Guru's grace, I have been entirely okay with it.

The only thing that has taken some getting used to is the stares. I generally keep my body covered, but I also like to swim. My swimming suit, if you will, involves shorts and a t-shirt. A lot of people - especially women - stare at my legs. It's as though they are willing me to feel bad about my choice to keep my hair.

Yet I do not give in to their desire to make me feel ashamed. I actually find my choice liberating and motivating, not to mention economical. Sikhs are supposed to be leaders - leaders do not care about what other people think when they know what they are doing in their heart is right. I am also saving money on these "cosmetic supplies" - money that adds up when you notice that the "treatments" are lifelong. Is there a reason that our hair keeps growing back no matter how much we try to stop it? Why not give in to the way Waheguru has made our bodies?

The most exciting part about this, however, is the opportunities it brings up to educate my brothers and sisters. When I catch people, especially children, staring at me, I look back and smile. If these people ask me questions, I have this golden chance to explain to people that I am a Sikh, and talk about the basic principles of our religion.

Several years ago, when I did shave my legs, I did not have this confidence. Now, ironically, when I am subject to public scrutiny, I do believe - in myself, in humanity, in Waheguru.

Utar gayo mere man ka sansa

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh!

Another beautiful shabd... [translations courtesy of sikhnet.com]

(1218-16)
saarag mehlaa 5.

thaakur tumH sarnaa-ee aa-i-aa.
O my Lord and Master, I have come to Your Sanctuary.

utar ga-i-o mayray man kaa sansaa jab tay darsan paa-i-aa. rahaa-o.
The anxiety of my mind departed, when I gazed upon the Blessed Vision of Your Darshan.

anbolat mayree birthaa jaanee apnaa naam japaa-i-aa.
You know my condition, without my speaking. You inspire me to chant Your Name.

dukh naathay sukh sahj samaa-ay anad anad gun gaa-i-aa.
My pains are gone, and I am absorbed in peace, poise and bliss, singing Your Glorious Praises.

baah pakar kadh leenay apunay garih anDh koop tay maa-i-aa.
Taking me by the arm, You lifted me up, out of the deep dark pit of household and Maya.

kaho naanak gur banDhan kaatay bichhurat aan milaa-i-aa.
Says Nanak, the Guru has broken my bonds, and ended my separaation; He has united me with God.

World Religions

"There will be no world peace until there is peace among the world's religions." -Hans Kung, Catholic theologian

I took the bus today, and was immediately greeted by a turbaned bus driver. This immediately put me in a good mood, a state of calmness. I wonder why. Just because a person is of my religion, does that make them a "better person"? I'd like to think not. But then why don't non-turbaned people strike the same sense of happiness in my heart? That's not true. Some do. Many people of different faiths can strike happiness in my heart.

I didn't even speak to this driver. I have no idea what kind of a person he is. I just know it takes a lot of courage to wear a turban, to keep your hair in this crazy world.

And I know that I will be thinking a lot more about how my ideal of peace between religions plays out in the way I interact with people of different faiths (and in the current world - the increasing number of atheists).

SikhNet Online Film Festival

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh!

Please check out the latest youth-created videos at the SikhNet Youth Online Film Festival: http://www.sikhnet.com/filmfestival/. Some are funny, some sad, some thought-provoking, some touching.... all making me proud to be a Sikh and engage in this dialogue created by films.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh!

Shabd: Satgur ki seva safal hai

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh.

Just wanted to share a beautiful shabad I came across ... translations courtesy of SikhNet.com. Apologies for lack of Gurmukhi font.

Sometimes I wonder what true Gur ka Seva means - serving others in my community? Serving Sikhs? Living according to the Guru Granth Sahib? Doing naam simran? I try my best to do some of everything - volunteer in my local community, educate the Sikh youth, meditate... well something for me to reflect on more. What do you think?

Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh!

*

(644-14)
salok mehlaa 3

satgur kee sayvaa safal hai jay ko karay chit laa-ay.
Service to the True Guru is fruitful and rewarding, if one performs it with his mind focused on it.

man chindi-aa fal paavnaa ha-umai vichahu jaa-ay.
The fruits of the mind's desires are obtained, and egotism departs from within.

banDhan torhai mukat ho-ay sachay rahai samaa-ay.
His bonds are broken, and he is liberated; he remains absorbed in the True Lord.

is jag meh naam alabh hai gurmukh vasai man aa-ay.
It is so difficult to obtain the Naam in this world; it comes to dwell in the mind of the Gurmukh.

naanak jo gur sayveh aapnaa ha-o tin balihaarai jaa-o.
O Nanak, I am a sacrifice to one who serves his True Guru.

The significance of kesh

I'll never forget the day my brother cut his hair. It hurt me so much that I couldn't even look at him in the face for several days.

It's been about five years since the event, and I'm still coming to terms with it. I've always wondered why we are so focused on whether or not people are cleanshaven or not. I always used to tell myself that it's the person inside and their actions that really matters. But the tables were quickly turned when "my own flesh and blood performed the act".

At first, I felt betrayed. Then, I felt angry at him. Why did he do that?

We grew up in a predominantly Caucasian town, where most of the boys in Sikh families we knew had cut their hair. I always knew it was hard for my brother to keep his joora. Kids always made fun of his "girl-like" hair, but he had no Sikh friends to look up to to learn how to deal with this problem.

Soon after, I felt angry at myself. Why hadn't I spent more time with him, showing him the importance of his religion?

Slowly, I worked towards acceptance. Despite his drastically different appearance, my brother was still the same caring person that he always was.

I began to think about all the other Sikh people I knew who cut their hair. I began to realize that despite my surface feeling that I did not judge them for not keeping kesh, I really did. Why? I didn't judge my non-Sikh friends, all of whom obviously were clean-shaven.

And why did it make my blood boil when none of the "Sikhs" in the latest Bollywood hit, Love Aaj Kal, had true, uncut dharis?

Finally, why did the youtube video I posted earlier this week give me such kushi when I watched it?

What are your thoughts on this often-discussed issue?

This is why we're hot!